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You know this very moment when you wake up, but are not completely awake yet, and for a couple of seconds the world seems OK, and then a feeling falls heavy on your head and in your heart, and after a moment of not knowing where this feeling is coming from, you remember, you realize, the world today is not OK, and you wish you could go back to those few seconds you felt safe. Well, that’s how I felt this morning when I woke up and remembered that David Bowie had died.

I believe David Bowie is the one musician that has been in my life for the longest time. Starting with the very scary Labyrinth, which I watched for the first time while at our godparents place when we were wee children, but which I was only able to watch and thoroughly enjoy two years ago in Berlin. Now I know that it is actually a funny and sweet film but back then I was scared to death by the handmade puppets and that freaky man who wanted to take the children.

A couple of years later our parents forced us to watch with them Christiane F , a classic tale of the drug scene in Berlin showed to German teenagers as scary tale of drug abuse. And man were we scared. But impressed with the music. So we waited for the next opportunity where our parents left the house and rewatched the whole film. Official version was we wanted to really get the agony. Truth was we wanted to listen again to all those songs. Specially the one where they run around the commercial center. I somehow always thought it was a tube hall, but no, it is actually the Europa Center. The song while they are running and climbing on top of the building is Heroes. Back then there was no internet, we didn’t have a CD player let alone an older sibling to provide us with music. So we really had to watch it on VHS.

The following years – I have to admit – I had very long cheating phases with other favourite singers (GN’R, REM, Lenny Kravitz) but somehow I always came back to Bowie. And since moving to Berlin four years ago he had become a constant part in my life; by discovering new and old songs, going to the exhibition about him at Martin Groupius Bau or simply by living in the same neighbourhood as he did. One of my favourite hang outs is the Slumberland at Winterfeltplatz, the same place where the first Dschungel was located.

I am not going to talk about his music, or the thousand ways he reinvented himself, or the inspiration he was for so many people. For me he was always there. Somehow he was always there. And I know he will always be.

May the stars shine bright for you where ever you are. I believe you when you say it won’t be boring.

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